Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month - Angie & Trevor's Story
October is Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month and I wanted to honor those families that have experienced loss. Especially those who have had the unfortunate experience of a miscarriage. In itself that is awful but unfortunately society makes it worse by downplaying how one should feel after. My goal is to bring an awareness that miscarriage is just as heartbreaking as any other loss by a mother and should be treated as such.
Today we honor Angie & Trevor Foley's story. We honor their second child who is no longer with us. I met Angie and Trevor while she was pregnant with their rainbow baby and third child who is now a few weeks old! Angie is one of the strongest women I've ever met and I'm so thankful to know her and am so grateful I have this platform to share her story.
Angie & Trevor's Story:
We have a beautiful 4 year old daughter who we luckily had no trouble conceiving and the thought of loss never crossed our minds when we got pregnant. Last year we decided to try for a second child and again, luckily after just 3 months of trying we got our positive pregnancy test and we were so excited! At 5 or 6 weeks I started to notice that I didn't feel pregnant anymore...my boobs didn't hurt like they did with my first pregnancy and I just felt different. At 7 weeks I started to cramp. I told myself it was just normal pregnancy pains. Then I started to spot...must just be implantation bleeding. Then I woke up to a lot of blood. When I went to the bathroom there was a clot and I knew it. My heart broke into a thousand pieces and I cried like I never have before. Driving to the hospital was such a surreal experience. My husband had convinced himself it was normal bleeding and we'd be OK but I felt so empty. When we arrived at the hospital I couldn't even tell the nurse what was wrong. I started to talk and choked on the words. How could this be happening? What did I do wrong? We waited forever and then went in for an ultrasound. The tech of course couldn't say anything but it was obvious. Another 2 agonizing hours and it was confirmed, the sac was empty. We went home and cried and cried and cried some more.
As nature continued to take its course I was reminded every time I went to the bathroom that we had lost our baby. I finally stopped bleeding 2 weeks later and went to the doctor for a cyst I had discovered. Low and behold I had a positive pregnancy test! My hcg levels had already gone down to zero so it appeared I was pregnant again! Weekly blood tests however showed I had either lost another baby or had an issue with my hormones. Either way it brought back so much pain. Every day with prayer and unending love and support from family and friends we healed a little more. It's not a pain you ever get over...it just starts to look differently.
September 19th we welcomed our rainbow baby, Asher into the world and when I kiss him, I know I'm sending my love also to his sibling in heaven. Within 3 months of my miscarriage I watched 2 friends and 2 family members also lose babies. My heart aches for anyone who experiences this loss but I remain hopeful that everyone will get their rainbows.
Reading their story my heart aches for them. I share Angie's sentiments' my heart aches for all mothers who have experienced loss. I hope that reading this gives you strength to share your story or at the least let you know you're not alone. I hope more women will share their stories because you never know who you will help.
If you feel called to share your story I would love to share it here. If you're uncomfortable we can even do it anonymously. I really think the more we share the more we can make it known that loss is loss for every family. How you lose a child doesn't make it any less real and painful. You can email me at email@example.com and I will share in one of my upcoming posts.
Congratulations Angie & Trevor on your rainbow baby!