This word GRATITUDE has been showing up a lot for me lately. I didn't quite understand at first...I mean I know what it means but I figured it was just because of the holidays but beyond just being the word and posts about it I am experiencing it. Now, I'm not trying to sound like an asshole who has never experienced gratitude but let's just say it wasn't something I really practiced on a regular basis. That however has started changing recently.
Now that I have been out of my depression episode for a couple weeks I am much more conscious of what I'm thankful for. I have been much more mindful of my gratitude and trying to be more aware of the things that make me feel that way. I am not perfect and there are days that I don't feel it at all. Those are usually days that I am having a depressive episode. Living with depression never fully goes away but I'm learning more and more to not let it control me.
Today was an exceptional day for me and feeling gratitude for my life. If you know me you know I have a lot going on and I am making changes that means I have less time for "me" and I'm ok with that. A week or so ago I would have been freaking out a little at the thought of taking my son out of his two days a week in daycare to be home full time. This weekend though my husband and I have been taking about it and it just makes sense for where we are in life right now.
This has a big impact to our life because I won't have as much free time to focus on my business but I know so many moms that make it work that I know I can too! Even better I woke up this morning feeling so good about the decision. I felt so grateful that I will have this opportunity to be home with my son and watch his little personality to continue to develop. It will be an adjustment and i don't expect it to be easy but I know that it is best for our family right now. I also know I can still be successful in my business and will do whatever I have to to make my dreams reality.
I know it doesn't come easy for all of us and I'm the first to admit it for myself but if you can, take a moment today to reflect on what you have to be thankful for. Practice gratitude and see how your mood changes. It is worth it and something I plan to work at everyday because it feels amazing.